The early years of Joshua’s life were immensely sad and painful, seemingly absent of hope. Nothing else compares to those grief filled early days that were full of uncertainty. However, as I read what I’ve written, I regret that I may have portrayed Joshua’s life as a negative, rather than ascribe significance and beauty to it.
Our story, though full of challenges, has also been enriched because of Joshua. What would I do and who would I be without him? He is laughter and love, an exclamation mark in the middle of a day.
Now, 20 years later, I choose to escape to be with him. One may imagine that this is solely for his benefit but in truth, he’s become a source of respite for me. When I am with him, I am drawn into a different rhythm and my own pace softens and slows; I am the child and he is the adult and I learn from him.
Who could have foreseen such a change in dynamic? In the beginning, it was impossible to conceive that my journey may result in good. I held back from walking on the path laid before me, fearing that it would destroy me. I was incapable of knowing what steps to take and relied on others to help and guide me. I cried until there were no more tears. My faith in God was weak and fractured.
However, the road did open up in front of me and it became familiar ground. The journey hasn’t been easy and I have known dark times. But I now find myself in open spaces; free to look behind without regret and forward with expectancy.
Flower in the Rain 